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Obama as Othello : A Shakespeare Parody. Act 5 Scene 1 - The Arab Spring in Egypt.

Updated on May 9, 2013

We now venture into Act 5 of our little play. But here is the link below that will take you back to where it all began, back on the campaign trail.

Source

Obama as Othello : A Shakespeare Parody. Act 5 Scene 1:

The Arab Spring in Egypt.

The scene is in the Oval Office at the White House in early 2011.

President Othell'Obama is in deep discussion around the table.

Present are Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and also his special adviser Senator Harold Brabantio.

The topic of their meeting is the so-called Arab Spring and the events of Tahrir Square in Egypt.

The President is understandably concerned.

.......................................

Obama: Just what is going on over there?

Brabantio: It's the Egyptian folks rising up against Mubarak at last. It was gonna happen sometime.

Obama: I don't understand. What's the beef? He's a cool dude.

Clinton: He dyes his hair.

Obama: Big deal! So does Berlusconi and I don't see no Italians rising up. Are you telling me that the Egyptians are stoked because he's got Grecian Formula on his head?

Clinton: But it's so dyed! Just as bad as Berlusconi, it doesn't even try to look natural.

Obama: He's over 80 years old, how natural can it look for an old-timer to have black hair?

Clinton: He could have made an effort. Maybe a mild streak. It would have shown good faith.

Brabantio: That's right. Trust is very important in the Arab psyche you see. It's a matter of honour and if your top guy can't fake it and get away with it then they're not gonna like it.

Obama: So if he goes with the grey look they're gonna get the hell back to their cribs?

Brabantio: Probably too late now Mr President. There's no turning back I guess.

Obama: I guess not

Brabantio: Let's face it, he looks like a gangster, especially wearing those expensive suits of his.

Obama: He is a gangster! But that's beside the point. What's the Egyptian army doing about it?

Brabantio: They're playing it cool. Apart from bumping off a few protesters here and some electrodes there they've been kinda nice about the whole thing. They don't like to turn on their own people, that's not their bag.

Clinton: Isn't that what they're for? We sure didn't have this kind of problem with Pinochet.

Brabantio: He didn't dye his hair and he had a real cool moustache too.

Obama: What about the head of the army?

Clinton: Very well groomed. He's mostly natural black with some flecks of grey around the ears but he has one of those horrendous comb-overs. He looks like the guy from 'Sergeant Bilko', you know? The old colonel?

Brabantio: Colonel Hall? Come on! He's nothing like him!

Obama: Never mind 'Sergeant freakin Bilko!! What about his leadership? Is he gonna do something about this uprising? We could have a goddam revolution on our hands you know.

Brabantio: I'm afraid he isn't a Cassio McChrystal, Mr President. He likes his boss and tends to follow orders.

Obama: Maybe we could remind him where he gets his toys and his kickbacks. We fund his lot to the tune of 1.3 billion dollars a year. What options have we got?

Brabantio: Play it cool I say. Send out the old signals as usual you know the kind of thing. 'The people have spoken', 'It's time for reform', 'President Mubarak is a moderate man, a force for good' and then we can say 'But maybe it's time to move on' and so and so on.

Obama: Who else we got on our side?

Brabantio: Well there's Suleiman the VP who's also Head of Intelligence and then there's Mohamed ElBaradei who used to run the International Atomic Energy Authority and Amr Moussa Chief of the Arab League

Obama: Suleiman sounds promising

Brabantio: He's a torturer

Obama: But one of ours?

Brabantio: Dunno, I'll need to check the rendition records with the CIA,

Obama: If we back him are we gonna support free and fair elections?

Brabantio: As long as the Muslim Brotherhood don't win,

Obama: Obviously!

Clinton: Absolutely! Far too sexist,

Obama: What?

Clinton: Brotherhood! How out of date is that? It is so yesteryear isn't it? We can't allow that kind of misogyny in a modern Egypt

Obama: Thank you Cleopatra but I'm more worried about Islamists taking over the show. We've got enough problems with the Iranians.

Brabantio: I wouldn't worry at this stage Mr President since we have the army in our pocket. If we hold our nerve, keep patient we can ensure a smooth transition and complete change back to the status quo. There's sure to be military rule for a while if Mubarak has to clear his desk so we'll have plenty of time to keep the Egyptians on our side.

Clinton: They're a big customer though so we'll need to keep them happy.

Brabantio: Yeah! a lotta tanks and a lotta aircraft and plenty more on the production line. So we don't wanna hang clogs on them.

Source

Clinton: Lots and lots of hair dye too if they want it

Obama: You're one to talk Hillary. You're still blonde, still as blonde as you were at High School I'll wager.

Clinton: Fresh touch up on my roots yesterday at a new boutique in Dupont. Private sitting. They put some Golden Garnier Fructice through it. It highlights my cheekbones don't you think? Do you like it?

Obama: Well all I can say is you don't look like a gangster. If Bill's happy then who am I to complain? It's not a subject that particularly enthrals me I have to say.

Brabantio: Ah! You say that now Mr President, you're only two years in the job. You've picked up a few flickers of ceiling paint since the campaign. Wait until the first term is up and you'll be reaching for the bottle.

Obama: The American President don't wear no hair dye!

Brabantio: Ronnie Reagan did, an interesting colour too

Obama: I ain't walking around with no green hair! How am I gonna look turning up at a G8 conference with a lump of turf on my head?

Clinton: You'd look like a gangster

Brabantio: A gangsta rapper maybe but without the bling,

Obama: I'll grow old gracefully thank you very much or maybe grow old quickly if this rumpus keeps up. I don't know what's happening with the Arabs and how this foul rout began. Who set it on?

Brabantio: The unions,

Obama: Jeez! I might have known,

Brabantio: They're losing their fear you see and it doesn't help that their economy is on it's sweet sorry ass. Nor does it help that their big shots are stealing the money.

Obama: That's nothing new

Brabantio: Sure! But people get mighty brave when they've got no food in the freezer. Give them just enough and no more and they'll probably get on with it. But when their bellies start to rumble then they're gonna grumble

Obama: Well there's gonna be a helluva rumble in this hood if we don't sort this out,

Brabantio: You sounded just like Ice-T there,

Clinton: So you did Mr President, maybe you should grow a little close-trimmed goatee,

Obama: Sure! And maybe I'll grow a pair and get you outa ma hair!

Brabantio: Hey dude! That's a cool rap!

Obama: And so is this meeting. Close the door behind you folks.

________________________________


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